I feel like I've been walking in a dark forest. I've left a trail of breadcrumbs behind me so I can find my way back - to normal, to the life I've known. Every few steps I let the pinch of bread hit the ground like an anchor. Every day, I wake up and walker further and further from all I've come to rely on. It's uncharted and a little scary. I feel unsupported. I feel a little lost.
But I've come to the point in this journey where I've run out of bread. I dropped the last crumb long ago and when I turn to look behind me there is no path back to the old life I used to live. A bird flies overhead with a stale crumb in his beak and I realize that even if I could keep leaving clues back to yesterday, they may not be there for me to find.
I can't go back.
But the woods before me seems darker than they did even just yesterday. It's like stepping into an abyss. It feels like floating - like walking on the dark side of the moon.
"I'd just like a little light," I whisper into the unknown space around me. "Hello?"
There is no reply, but I do feel a flicker. It's like a warm glow igniting in my chest.
"Help!" I try to call out, but the sound is nothing more than a cracked whisper.
The silence is the only response.
But my feet are still moving.
And the warmth in my chest - the light of my heart burns a little brighter.
I'm going to have to do this myself.
I laugh to think it. I look back again to the path I've traveled - back to a time when I looked to others to light the way. All the yesterdays in my memory are crowded with the "should's" and "should not's" pressing against me by others.
"You will be safe if you do things this way."
"We have your best interests at heart."
"Trust us. We will light the way."
Why would I want to go back to that?
Those voices aren't here in the deepest part of the woods. Those rules can't reach me.
And now the floating feeling I have, the unsupported and untethered sensation feels like ... FREEDOM.
Floating is a lot like flying.
Anything is possible in this stretch of woods. I have been given this space to learn how to be free again. I have been given this dark and secret woods to learn how to fly.
Wait ... I haven't been given anything. I found this place on my own. I claimed this space and time. It is here for ME and I am worthy of this dark, new world.
Suddenly, I'm not afraid. I find I love the dark. It is a gift.
For in the darkness, I have a rare and beautiful opportunity. I get to see how brightly I can shine.
Now is the time to find your light. Now is the time to shine in ways you never knew were possible.
We are infinite possibilities wrapped in the miracle of this life.